This One's for the Boys.

This summer has, at times, found me to be a somewhat teary, sentimental heap of my former self.

It has a lot to do with This Guy here on the left...


I don't remember giving him permission to become a grownup. Perhaps I need to put a sticky note on my bathroom mirror as a teeth-brushing companion that will remind me to quit looking back longingly to when he was little. Maybe. But when this spring found him graduating from Junior College and taking a full time job with Verizon to save up money for the next two years of college, I was shaken by wondering...what happened to my little boy?

He's been in training for a month in Pittsburgh and last week I packed up all the rest of the kids and we went out to stay with him for two days. We had a nice relaxing time hanging out in the hotel pool...



and basketball court,




and going to Starbucks!


But it felt so strange to be doing it without Mitchell. When we left to head home, he walked us out to the car. I knew I would shed tears as soon as I hugged him and...I did. Not wanting to look like a dumb mom (even though I am a dumb mom), I quickly ducked into the car. But my sweet Mitchell, who I am so blessed to be able to say actually likes his mother, stood and waited till I would look back at him and wave. I bravely pulled out, leaving my "little" boy behind and headed home with the rest of my kiddos in tow. When I finally couldn't choke it back any longer, and I let a for-real blubbering cry escape, Christian said from the back of the van, "What's she laughing about?"

"She's not laughing...she's crying, dummy!" Gracie offered.

"Matthew," I told Matthew as he rode shotgun, "you are gonna have to start naming off reasons why I shouldn't like Mitchell so much. That will help me out here."

"Ahhh...Christian would be better at that than me," he said.

"He's right, Mother!" called Christian from the back seat.

I'm still waiting to hear them.



...they grow up without your consent don't they :)





Then there's the issue of this:





Little boys and Little League Baseball.
Without a doubt...some of the best times of my life!
We have been playing little league baseball for 13 YEARS!..and last week...it ended.

(Oh, here I go. Hold on a minute while I go grab a tissue.)




This was Christian's final year of Little League...thus ending the Steele's 13 year Little League career. When we play teams from other leagues, my older boys will always comment on the names on the back's of the player's jerseys..."I played against his older bother," they'll say. I figure it's the same way with us. Their name has preceeded them because there's been a Steele in the mix for 13 years.



So now there's the big brother now acting as a coach...



There's the family who has been sitting here for 13 years...









First there was Mitchell. Our slugger who gave it his all and hit his first grand slam on his momma's birthday at age 10! (he was 10..not me) He was our first All-Star. I never would have dreamed before this boy came along, that I would love every minute of spending day after day driving all over the place to sit and sweat in the sun at sometimes three or four games a day.... But we loved nothing more. We gladly loaded that car and headed out to as many tournaments as his daddy could squeeze into a season.




Then came Matthew. Our powerhouse kid who could hit the ball out of the park at age 8. You know...the kid that makes his momma feel like "big stuff" sitting there in the stands because..."that's her kid". I wanted to watch forever.
He called himself Double-"O" Steele



And Christian. The Steele's last little-leaguer. This guy loves to play baseball. He gives it his all everytime and I have loved watching each and every one of his games.

Such an awesome kid!


Mitchell and I sat at our final Little League game the other night and counted up year by year, kid by kid, to come up with a

"Grand Total Little League games for the Steele Family"

Here it is: 650

So I guess after doing something you loved six-hundred-and-fifty times...you"re allowed to miss it right?

They say there are new things that replace the old. My friends say that things change and new, good things come. I believe that. Of course, I know that's true. But this Momma is allowing a few tears to fall for the old right now and... I figure...that's ok too.

You guys are the most incredible blessing to your mother and father. We love you more than words can say.

So boys...for all the thousands of pitches your daddy threw in the
batting cages. And the way he sported that "father-pride" when his
arm was sore from throwing so much batting practice. And for all the times
your mother screamed and cheered and embarrassed you. And for all the
thousands and thousands of times you swung those bats...your mother and
father loved every minute of it.
Every minute.
And we love you.





It's been a great ride.

Reality Happens...but not this week

Reality stepped aside and watched as we spent a wonderful, beautiful week in a gorgeous house on the Outer Banks with the family this past week.
We spent our days lying on the beach, biking, playing in our pool, and just loving being together. Like I said...reality only watched from the sidelines :)


Oh, if I could just freeze these kids in time. One of my famous sayings has always been, "Why can't you just have kids and KEEP them!"

On our Gorgeous front porch with Gammy (Pappy unfortunately couldn't get away this year), Uncle Howard and Aunt Sue, Ben, Jennie, and of course, our clan.


Little Miss Faith heading for the beach.






You seriously could not pay me to get buried like that!



My sweet Grace.






Well this year the guys somehow got into some marathon style biking. We're talking like FORTY miles a day! Mitch, Mitchell, Ben, and Matthew. We hauled all the bikes down on dad's truck, parked the truck in the garage, and figured we wouldn't need it out again until we headed home. Well it came out when Ben blew a tire and someone had to go rescue him....and then when Matthew blew a tire and someone had to go rescue him after reading the Tweet he posted from out along the side of the road. Then Mitch broke his axle (he actually walked back)....
But, one day someone said, "Oh, park in back of the truck, we wont need to get it out."
"Sure we will," I said, "when Mitchell needs rescued!" (he never did)

Their poor bikes were just screaming for mercy.


and Bocce Ball on the beach



So on Monday morning, Christian decided to dig a really deep hole...far enough up that the high tide couldn't reach it. (Actually he decided this back in the winter and so came prepared with "better shovels" this year!) Anyways, What was one hole on Monday, became 2 holes on Tuesday, and by Saturday...it had become this tunnel system that was constructed with much help from Uncle Howard. It's funny, you can't tell in these photos at all...but the holes on either end of the tunnel were actually deeper than the top of Faith's head. Not sure why the depth perception is bad in the pictures. Anyways, it was great fun. Above is Faith getting pulled out of the hole.






Matthew.

Mitchell, cousin Jennie, and Matthew boogie boarding.




...and Faith and Uncle Howard spent ALOT of time "panning for gold". We told him if he ever loses his job as a train engineer (how cool is that), that at least he knows how to pan for gold!!

We did have one extended period of pouting when Uncle Howard had had enough gold panning for one day.


Christian and Faith

Grace, Faith, Mitchell



I Love, Love, Love these two shots!



Make that THESE Three Shots!!!!!

Matthew


Mitchell



Ah, My KIDDOS! If that's not the most amazing blessing, I truly don't know what is.


And on the last day, my three young men lingered at the beach till everyone else had gone up to the house. The felt the need to fill in the holes and tunnel so that no one else could claim their "turf" when they were gone. After filling it, they also felt the need to jump in it...you know...just because it was the right thing to do.



....and then one sun-drenched young man, boogie board in tow, made his final walk from the sand to the showers.



Hey reality...we wouldn't mind if you stayed away a little longer.

Six Basic Facts of Life

So much to write. I decided to categorize from light to heavy as I scan through several important facts of life.


Fact#1. You Can Count on Sand Shovels

Every spring I wonder how I could have forgotten how extremely difficult it is to homeschool when warm weather beckons the kids outside. The first thing they want to know in the morning is, "How soon will we be done?" It's really hard to accomplish anything like that, and then, of course, we have to be done early in order to make it to baseball practice anyways.

So, I left one of my young men at his desk yesterday...math book open...pencil in hand.

Fifteen minutes later I peeked in his door to find him sitting on his bed by his open window...chin propped on the window sill...just staring outside.

He sweetly turned to me and then he asked me an all-important arithmetic question...

"Mother," he said, "when are we gonna go get our new sand shovels for the beach?"

Oh, hummm...



















Fact#2. No Matter How Long It's Been...It is Still There.

It really is there.
I knew it was there.
But with the passing of time, I had begun to wonder.
But the other day, it boldly shone through...making up for lost time.
Here it is...




Ahh the lovely black flooring beneath my deluxe-triple-sorting laundry hamper.
Hello, my old friend.
It's nice to see the light of day today isn't it.
Soak it in, because come bath time.....well...we won't think about that now.



Fact#3. What's the Deal with Bags??


Bags. They seem harmless enough. However, coupled with girls they become quite bothersome.
Do all girls...Bag Things? Or is it just my girls?

When ever they can't find something...It's usually because they've "Bagged" it somewhere.





...Maybe we could bag up crayons and books...

...or bag up ALL of our pajamas because...who knows?

...or a stack of magazines

or maybe we could bag up books, cards, paper, pencils, toys, and our cooking apron with a spare pare of undies in the top of the bag for...for...well who knows??



You see my dilemma?
Every time I see them coming with "bags" to take along in the car, or play store, or play camping, or whatever, I tell them, "You know you are gonna have to put all that stuff back!"

Yeah. That may happen the next time the floor appears under the laundry bin again.



Fact #4. Brothers Love Ballet Recital.

Upon being "released" from the theater last spring at the close of his sister's ballet recital the eldest (then 18) remarked to my father, "Well, only 364 more days till we have to endure this again."

Last night around the dinner table, young men were threatening to bring paint ball guns to ballet recital...

Ahhh, my sweet Gracie....Momma can't wait for recital.
...and besides...the boys don't have paint ball guns anyways.



Fact#5. All Babies come from a Momma's Tummy.

It came out while she shoveled cereal into her mouth.


"Mother, where did Gracie come from?"

"God put her in my tummy."

"But didn't she come from China?"

"No, she came from here. From my tummy. She came from God just like you did, but we had to come to China to get you."

"But I wasn't in anybody's tummy."

"Yes, you were. You were once in a Momma's tummy too, just like Gracie. But that Momma couldn't take care of you and so she put you somewhere so I could come and get you, because we could take care of you."

"Oh."

It won't always be that easy.
How do you deal with the fact that your own flesh and blood gave you up for whatever reason...and that you can never know who they are?



Fact#6. A Brother is born to Help in Time of Need.

I watched them walk away.

Three boys.

Three boys that I love so much it makes my heart hurt. Oh, boys are good for a momma's soul.

One small, skinny, uniformed boy....Two tall, big brothers, one on either side.

Granted, it hasn't been easy. Seemingly overnight we went from having daddy around 24/7, working just down the street at any given moment of the day, home by 5pm, coaching all the boys teams in the evenings...........to having daddy working an hour away, not getting home until after practices are over, and even most games are over at night.

It was hard for everyone. But it's been a year, and the passing of time does wonders for adjustments.

But it's my youngest man I've felt for the most. He only got Coach Daddy for a few years. The big brothers got him for many. And I've felt really badly about it.

But last night, I pulled up to the curb just in time for batting warm-ups, popped the hatch and the sliding door....and three boys stepped out of the van. One small...uniformed and carrying his ball bag. And two large...set on making sure the small boy was warmed up properly and sure beyond any doubt that they knew much more about baseball than did the coach of the small boy. Their certainty cemented by the fact that they had been taught everything they knew by their daddy, and he was the best coach ever.



And as they walked up the hill toward the cage, the two big boys flanked the small one on either side.....

And I got tears in my eyes.
It was happiness and sadness. It was pride and love. It was a longing and rejoicing.

It was my big ones come full circle.

It was their stepping in to fill their daddy's shoes.

It was my big one, filling in for dad behind our youngest batter.



It was their thinking that the new coach didn't hold a candle to their daddy.

And it was this amazing way that they assumed the responsibility for the younger....and it was the way that they seemed proud to do it.

How Can He Be This Old?

So Mitchell turned 19! 19?!! How can he be that old?



After only one year out of high school, my sweet Mitchell is graduating with his Associates Degree this month with a 4.0 GPA. He will be transferring schools now to finish up his Bachelors. He is taking next school year off to work and earn money for his Junior and Senior years, and has already landed himself a job with Verizon as the youngest employee they've ever hired! They have an amazing tuition program and its a blessing.

We're proud and thankful.
We love you Mitchell.

From the mouths of babes...

Oh, the note to post this has been sitting on my desk for a week now. I meant to couple it with other things but time (or lack thereof) has forced it to stand alone.

That's ok.

It's a stand-alone sort of comment anyways...

Last Tuesday night when I was putting Faith to bed, she was saying her prayers.

She prayed, "Thank you for my mommy and daddy and please let me keep them. And please let my mommy always keep me." A child just shouldn't have to pray that her mommy would keep her.

Today she told me, "It was a good thing when you came to China and dop-a-did me."

THANKS

Some of you sent me messages saying you voted for my Mitchell's monitor design and he WON!!! So thanks!!! He is really excited. He gets a custom-made set of top-of-the-line in-ear monitors complete with his very own design on them. How cool is that for my sweet musician!